Switching to Natural Personal Care - My family

When I began my journey of using natural personal care, I naturally wanted to include my family.
It has been a journey of patience, connecting and understanding.

I thought by just sharing, why one should use natural products I can get my family, friends or
anyone to move to natural products. Turns out is not that simple. It's not enough to say "Hey, your products have toxic chemicals so stop using them." I need to engage with them, understand their needs and slowly and gradually it will happen. The switch will not happen the way I want rather in the way they want and I need to respect that.

The biggest thing that I think helped was that I was using natural personal care products myself every day. I was walking the talk. Also, I never imposed or judged but rather just showed the choices and let them choose. 

Just by natural products being available in the house, my mother started to pick up the products and gradually began to use them. She is the one in the family who has always been willing to try. In fact when I began Dhanak, my business of natural products, I used her as a guinea pig to try my products on and get feedback.

Seeing her switch to cloth pads for menstrual hygiene, coconut oil for moisturizing and bath powder for bathing were proud moments for me

My father is on a different level, he doesn't use any products forget natural. Salt is enough for his brushing and plain water for everything else like bathing, washing clothes and even shaving. I was happy to contribute by making a foot salve for his cracked heels.

Switching to natural products with my younger brother is where it has been fun and a learning

experience for me. 

He loves his Deodrant, nice smelling soap, shampoo and other products. He plainly refused to even try some of my products because they don't smell appealing to him. This gave me the challenge to make products that can appeal to him. I made a peppermint mouthwash and he gladly started using it. He likes the soaps I make for bath, hand wash and laundry, he even says that they wash well. These were small achievements for me.

There are some products he refuses to switch like shampoo or toothpaste.

Initially, I thought that I am right and he is wrong, I need to change him. However, he doesn't see anything wrong with the products he is using so I soon understood it his journey. When he wants to make the switch he will.  At first, I couldn't accept but as time went by, I learnt to accept his needs and choices. I realized my role is to show him the choices. 

I have been persistent and so has he, and we both have rubbed off on each other a little.
He started using a natural deodorant I bought, I was jubilant. After a while, he said he no more liked it, which was fine by me but I keep trying. :)

There have been rare occasions when I have managed to massage some oil and shikakai powder on his hair  - both of which he completely dislikes so of course so he washes it off with shampoo but its a win-win.

I enjoy the debates and arguments we both have, it has really helped me respect his choices and further anyone choices. I have learnt to look beyond right and wrong, rather look at it as choices for our lifestyle. 

The elephant who walked her own path

The elephant who walked her own path

 written by Asawari Mathur

It was a sunny afternoon in the forest. Arvi sat by the river under a big shady tree thinking deeply. Staring at the river flowing, she remembered her innocent childhood days as a baby elephant swimming in the river, having conversations with the fishes, skipping stones with her trunk and having a lot of fun. 

She let out a loud sigh! Life was simpler as a young elephant. Arvi had now come to age, she was a mature and responsible adult elephant. When elephants came to age, they had to participate in a fight to prove their worth and place in the elephant herd. Arvi did not want to participate in the fight but she did not know what she wanted to do in her life. She sat completely confused and lost.

Arvi recalled last evening’s conversation with her parents. Her mother had asked “Arvi you have now come to age and it is time for you to participate in the herd fight, It is time you began preparing for the fight so you can pass. What do you think?” 

“I don't wish to participate in the fight, I think it's an unfair way to figure out my place in the herd. I don't see value in spending time and effort over some stupid fight,” replied Arvi 

Mother replied  “That's completely fine, I support your decision to not fight. I am happy that you are thinking about your life. However I have a question, what do you want to do then?”

“I don't know” was Arvi’s reply. “ I know what I don't want but I don't know what I want. I want to explore how to live a worthy elephant life”.

Hearing this Arvi’s father suggested “How about taking a trip, travel to the ocean which is on the far end of the forest, stay there for some days, explore, I am sure you will figure out what you want to do in life”

Arvi had come to the river to spend some time alone to think. She had declared her decision to not participate in the fight and do something different but she was worried and scared, was it the right decision. Arvi was clear about one thing, she did not want to live like a normal elephant. She just did not know what it looked like or what her purpose in life was.

 She thought about her father's suggestion to travel, it sounded very scary. She had always lived in the comfort of her parents and had never travelled or lived alone. Everything looked new and difficult.

While she was sitting wondering, a wild dog came to the river to drink water. The dog saw arvi sitting sad and approached her and asked what’s wrong. When Arvi shared her problem with the dog, he asked in wonder “ Why are you scared to travel alone, Did your mother not teach you to live in the forest? 

Arvi shared “ No, my mother did not teach me anything. When I was born, my mother decided she wanted to raise me differently. In the elephant herd, she saw all the baby elephants being taught everything by their mother, how to find food, to bath, swim, to communicate, to survive in the forest, everything was taught. She felt this was stopping the elephants to blossom and live life fully, she felt this way of growing up killed the joy of learning so she separated from the herd to raise me and my brother differently. Even my father decided to live with us instead of living in solitary as tuskers do in the forest. My parents together created an environment of open learning for me and my brother. They did not teach me anything, they let me learn by myself. For instance, I learnt to swim in this very river by myself. I spent days in the river playing and exploring and even falling and then I learned to swim.

Hearing this the dog said “ wow that is so interesting! I don't understand why you are worried then. If you have always lived differently and learnt by yourself, then why worry about not fighting and why be scared to travel alone, you can learn that too”

Arvi felt reassured after her conversation with her new friend the wild dog and set out to the ocean, it was a scary trip but she managed it.

The ocean was amazing, The big vast ocean filled arvi with hope and possibilities. Arvi spent many days at the beach, exploring, learning new things, making new friends with the other animals living on the beach and having a lot of fun. The days on the beach gave many new experiences and perspectives to Arvi. Travelling and then living alone, gave Arvi the space to be independent and to stand her own feet. This gave her confidence and courage to be who she wants to be.

One evening Arvi was sitting on the beach watching the sunset. It was a breathtaking, wind on her face, the sound of the waves, the sun, the trees, just everything around her. Arvi understood at that moment that she loved the forest, she wanted to work on protecting and caring for nature.

Arvi returned home with a newfound passion. She decided to work on her passion to find success and her place in the elephant herd instead of fighting. 

She decided to share about the importance of nature and how as animals we can care for it. She began with her herd of elephants but they did not want to listen. They instead said “ Why are you wasting your time, why don't you just fight. You are ruining your future”. Arvi then went to talk to the other animals, very few listened to her. Her plan wasn’t working. She decided to try some other way to care for the earth. 

She decided she would plant trees. She set out with determination. She began digging holes with her feet, but they were too big and she just slipped and fell. She tried digging with her trunk but it would just fill up with soil and after a lot of hard work, Arvi barely managed to plant a few trees. 

Tired and defeated, Arvi once again felt lost. She had found her passion yet she couldn’t find success, she felt empty within. 

She went to her parents and said “ I don't know what to do, I don't know how can I find my place in the forest”

Arvi's father asked “ Why are you trying to fit into the herd? To whom are you trying to prove your worth? Why are you chasing success defined by others? Think Arvi, 

what is that you want? What is your dream Arvi? How will your life be worthy for you?

This got Arvi thinking, she remembered her childhood, when she was a baby elephant all she wanted was every day to be happy. Arvi realized that happiness every day was what will make her life worthy and successful. 

And that’s what Arvi did. Instead of fitting into her elephant herd or their definition of success, Arvi created her own path. The wild dog helped her dig holes to plant trees, her parrot friend helped her talk to other animals, her deer friend taught her more about plants. Likewise, Arvi created her own herd with different animal friends and worked on fulfilling her dream of caring for the forest. Doing what she loved every day became Arvi's new path for living a joyful elephant life. 

This Story is based on my own life story. My life of being a self-directed learner and living a no degree, self charted life. Thanks for reading!

Switching to Natural Personal Care - My personal journey

I learnt about why I should use natural personal care in a workshop I attended called "Rethinking Development" which was about environment sustainability, It is through this workshop that my passion for environmental sustainability sprouted and I began my journey of exploring natural personal care.
I began using many alternatives but a complete switch did not happen, there were still days I would go back to my regular shampoo or other cosmetics.
The convenience and comfort that I had with my regular products were preventing me from completely switching. In terms of time and convenience using a regular shampoo was much easier than hair wash powder. My mind blocks were stopping me from completely letting go of the toxic products in the bathroom.

The following year, I was part of the facilitating team of the same workshop. I happen to be taking the session "Toxins behind our cosmetics". For this session I did a lot of research, this really moved me. A spark of motivation hit me, and my New year resolution for 2016 was that I will only use natural and safe personal products. I am proud to say that it happened, I went through with my resolution and I never turned back since then.
Making and using natural products for personal use flowed into Dhanak - selling and sharing them with others. Through my journey in Dhanak, My understanding of making and using natural products really widened and deepened.

Personally, for me the easiest switch when it comes to leading a natural and sustainable lifestyle was menstrual hygiene products, I was very smoothly and comfortably able to switch from sanitary napkins to cloth pads.
I feel taking small steps is a good way to transit into a natural lifestyle, especially natural personal care.

I began with an easy switch, replacing my lip balm from vaseline to natural beeswax lip balm.
Then I switched from toothpaste to toothpowder and from soap to bath powder.
I was lucky to live in a place where I had access to good toothpowder and plenty of trees for datun(tree twigs to brush like neem)

and so on went on switching products.

The most difficult switch was shampoo, Hair wash powder requires your time and patience. To have a good and efficient wash one needs to apply the paste and leave for 15-20 minutes before washing off while the shampoo is an instant wash.
I had to change my mindset for this switch, Work an attitude of natural living within and stop telling myself that is time-consuming. Now I look at it as a self-care time and have no difficulty using hair wash powder even when I am travelling!

Initially, when I would travel I did not use natural. I would convince myself, that during travel it's tough to use natural products like oil for moisturizer or hair wash powder so let's carry shampoo and cream.
However, once I got comfortable with natural personal care at home, I was able to challenge myself to do it on travel too.

A big change for me in this journey has also been embracing my natural beauty. Loving my self for who I am. Now bathing, washing my hair and caring for my body has become a self-care ritual and  I developed a loving relationship with my body.

I was never really fond of makeup, though I enjoyed putting nail polish and occasionally makeup. Once I understood how toxic this is for my physical health, emotional health and the planet. I cannot use any commercial cosmetic or personal care product.

Volunteering during Lockdown

APRIL-MAY 2020

Amidst the chaos of Covid-19, Safe and secure in my house during lockdown I felt helpless. I could see the challenges that the country was facing. The frontline workers, the migrant workers, the common man was going through tough times yet I was sitting at my home.

Some friends were volunteering by going out and distributing food in the cities, but I live in a village where that's not required. How can I be of help?  More news I saw, more unsettled I felt with the privilege and comfort I felt during the lockdown.
Personally, for me, Lockdown had been an amazing time. Break from my business gave me an opportunity to do so many other things. I was thoroughly enjoying my lockdown but how can I be happy when so many people are going through bad times.

This gave rise to the opportunity of Online volunteering. Having the ability to speak Hindi, landed me into volunteering with migrant workers who came to the southern states from north India to work. My work was to speak to them over the phone, listen to them, understand their problems and then find ways to support and help them out.

It was a tough job, to listen to their problems and not get emotionally effected and keep my mind straight. To not take on their problems onto me or get drained by the helplessness of the situation.

My phone would be buzzing the whole day with calls.

Access to food, money to pay rent and a way to travel back home to their native villages were the most common issues. Unfortunately, these were the most difficult to solve!

Having a lack of resources on hand and having no understanding of the ground reality added to the difficulty of helping then as a volunteer. The whole experience really pushed me to be resourceful, To go beyond my comfort zone and talk to strangers, To handle emotions and above all be consistent and dedicated to the work no matter what obstacles.

I experienced good and bad, Black and white, Hope and despair. Which gave me a realization that this the reality, nothing is perfect and we all are human.

Lockdown and volunteering taught me handling myself in unpredictability, not letting emotions pull me down and living in the present 

Many times I was able to offer support, find resources to help, but sometimes I wasn't able to.
The times I was able to support and do something about the problem was what gave me strength.
The thanks that I received from the migrant workers was worth all the effort and time I put.

It was also amazing to be part of the group energy, be part of the volunteering group. I t was beautiful to see how if a group of people come together with the intention to create change and contribute it is possible to do it despite the challenges. 

Some stories - One help seeker had a pregnant wife, due at the end of May. With no work, he was running out of resources. I was able to provide him with support through finances, rations and emotional support until his wife gave birth to a baby boy and came back home. A picture of the cute newborn was enough for me to know I could contribute to someone's life.

I also did the whole tango of organising a private bus for a group of migrant workers to travel to their home in the north from south. Pass, permits, money and other dimensions of getting this was a challenging task to do. When they reached home, all the effort was worth it. 

Of course, the whole situation and problems were much larger than me, but these small actions were important to me.

I am left with so much gratitude and admiration of the hard work that the countless people - government officials, NGO's, volunteers and others did. They have done so much, worked countless hours to support people in despair. It is just breathtaking to witness.

I am glad I have been able to contribute and be part of the solution not be part of the problem.