An illusion of choice. Am I a free consumer?

When I enter a supermarket, or when I browse online, I encounter numerable choices. As a consumer, I feel that I have the freedom to choose, to decide what product I want to buy. However, I would like to question this sense of freedom of choice. 

Do I get to choose whether I want toxic chemicals in my soap or not? Do I get to choose if I want it to be packaged in single-use plastic or not? When companies choose to influence me on a psychological level to buy a soap, where is my freedom? Of course, there are different fragrances, colours & types of soap available but if you zoom out and really analyse, there is only one popular, mainstream option. Do I have the freedom to choose the right soap for me or for that matter any other consumer good?

If I wish to buy a bar of soap I can choose from neem to lemon or creamy to clear. I can choose Lux or Dove or Pears or Dettol or any other brand. But am I really the one making a choice or has the system already made choices for me?

Am I really choosing or have the choices for me have been already made by the system?

Let me try and explain this with a story.
 A man was drinking in a bar with his friends when the clock struck at 10 pm. Halfway through his drink, he got up hastily to leave. His friends mocked him, "Are you leaving your drink midway because you are scared of your wife?" They asked him, "Are you the man of the house or a mouse?". The man replied ''I am the man of the house. If I was a mouse then my wife would have been scared of me, not the other way around." When he reached home, his wife was angry because he was late again. The angry wife began to chase him with a rolling pin in hand. The man ran all around the house with his wife on tow. When he reached the bedroom he quickly slipped under the bed,  where he knew his wife couldn't fit. His wife screamed "Why are you hiding under the bed? Are you the man of the house or a mouse?". The man responded, "I am the man of the house. That's why I have the freedom to sleep wherever I want".

Did he really have the freedom to sleep wherever he wanted or he had no other choice but choose to stay in an illusion of choice?

Did he really have the freedom to sleep wherever he wanted? Or did he have no other choice but to stay in an illusion of having a choice? While sleeping under the bed we may feel we have the choice between the different companies and technologies of phones or TV or clothes or cosmetics. The important question is if we have blinded ourselves with the current reality of the market and stopped thinking beyond it. In this process have we forgotten to consider our health and our planet's well-being?

Here I would like to state the fact that there is no legal definition of the words Ayurvedic, Natural, Organic, Healthy. I can label a packet of chips Healthy and fill it with whatever ingredients and sell it to you. I am not implying that all ingredients and all companies are bad or that they have a bad intention. All that I am asking you is, "Are you are making an informed choice?". "Do you know what is there in your so-called Natural Ayurvedic Toothpaste?

If freedom means choosing whatever type of clothes I want to wear, am I aware of the workers who are underpaid, overworked and abused to make those fashionable branded clothes so affordable?

If freedom means keeping my hair the way I want, am I aware of the harmful chemicals put in shampoos, hair gels, conditioners and hair colours?

If freedom means having the choice to eat veg or non-veg food, do I know how cruelly animals are treated in today's mass meat industry? Do I know that the modern meat industry is one of the top contributors to global warming?

Do I and you live in a false sense of freedom?

For many of us, shopping has become an activity to feel good about ourselves. Using one's own credit card make one feel free and independent. But what are you really free from? Haven't we become slaves to modern stereotypes of being fashionable, successful and happy. How and why does owning the best thing available in the market dictate my self-worth? And mind you, the best things in the market change every day.

Leading a modern and free life to me doesn't mean falling prey to a consumeristic lifestyle. To me, a free life means being true to who I am. It means living my life to its full potential and leading a conscious lifestyle.

 

Protest for Climate Justice.

Greta Thunbery is an inspiring young environmental activist. Her strikes for climate change has given rise in the environmental justice movement.  Inspired by her, around the globe people are protesting for climate change. India is one such country to have just recently adopted this phenomenon of friday for future. Friday for future essentially means fighting on every Friday for a better future for coming generations.

I attended the first such protest happening in Bangalore on the 24th of May. It was also my first experience of attending a protest. I have always read about protest and been very inspired by it but also there is a fear around protest, due to the news we see in the media about violence and stuff.

When I arrived at the protest, I was disappointed. There were very few people, few means around 100 or so but I was like this is no use, to create an effect we need 1000's. People were standing on the step of the Bangalore Townhall. Many were holding different posters, with messages about the environment. On the mike, someone was singing a song, which I couldn't understand at all because of all the traffic noise. For a moment I felt like leaving, thinking I have seen all there is to the event. Since I had travelled a long way to the event I decided to stick around for a while.

They read out the protest appeal - It was an appeal to the environment minister to do some changes in govt. policy to create climate justice. There was an online petition which they asked us to sign and I did that. In my mind, there was this thought "this all is not going to create any effect because the scale is too small for govt. to take action. What is the point of this protest? It is hopeless for the planet"

Next was a talk about how in our personal lives we can be agents of change. How changes in our lifestyle can heal the planet. I knew everything they shared but I realized the importance of this strike. It is not an easy path to change and it has to happen in small steps and this was the beginning. The crowd was mainly youth, which was amazing. Because the young people of the world are the torch bearers of change.
It was nice to see people enthusiastically ask questions about what they can do in their lives and equally great to see young people answer the questions. Veganism, no plastic, planting trees whatever it may be if people are doing it, are aware of it and able to reach 100 people by the strike then its an achievement.

The government may not change immediately but it knows that the people are rising slowly. The Jhatkaa organisation along with Friday for future India will continue to organise such strikes. This shows hope and possibility for change. I left the event with awe and hope. I felt great to be able to participate in the peacefull strike for climate justice.

We declare Climate Emergency! We want Climate Justice and we need it NOW!

Travelogue : Himalayan Trek

I found myself amidst mountains, full of greenery, rocks, streams and far away peaks of snow. A family trek took me to the Himalayas for a trek. I wouldn't have gone or planned it myself, I not the adventurous type and I dislike the cold. Having a family that enjoys meaningful holidays rather than full of touristy stuff is very beneficial and that is how I landed in the cold but beautiful Himalayas.

It was a 4-day trek called the Rupin Supin Trek, it was an easy level trek. It was a new, challenging and fun experience for me. Every day we trekked around 8km for 7-8 hours. The trekking was difficult but it was fun to walk. Of course, climbing uphill was tougher than walking down. 

The best experience was the snow. First time in my life I was experiencing snow even though it was just a few 100 meters of snow, walking uphill on snow was scary, I felt I would slip and fall down the mountain. Coming down the snow was super fun because we came sliding down in the freezing cold snow!

Before coming for the trek, I worked on my fitness at home however I was still worried about my physical ability and thought that I might have to deal with body pain. I had underestimated my physical capability. The only problem I had to deal with was the car sickness I felt during the travel to the base camp and back. My body was quite capable of trekking on the level we went.

I really disliked the cold. Maybe because I have never lived in a cold area, I find it difficult to cope with cold. The mountains were cold and that was something I did not enjoy and will be one of the major aspects for me when considering another trek. I just not built for the cold. 

We stayed in tents. Everyday day we camped at different places. I was challenging for me to sleep in tents, in sleeping bags in the cold. I am very grateful for the organiser's Himalayan Hikers because they took good care of us and pampered us with good food. I am also thankful to the mules who carried our backpacks for us so we could trek with ease.

Apart from my family, a friend's family had also come along, It was super fun to play cards in the evening after the trek in the camp. I learnt some new games and enjoyed the fun company of family and friends. The villages, the children, the houses, the goats, the dogs were so different from what I have seen and so cute! I enjoyed the beauty of the place and the kind nature of the people in the mountains. 

I was very pleased to see our trip organisers take care of the environment, they made sure not to use single-use plastic and carried out packed lunches in steel boxes on the trek every day. However, I completely enjoyed food without considering my sustainability or health values like appy terta pack, toffees, kurkure, Maggi etc. I broke my values happily just for the trek.

Overall it was an amazing experience and I would recommend everyone to experience it at least once in their lifetime. I am not sure I will go again but I will cherish the memories.

Where is happiness lost?

I am looking for my friend who got lost, would you help me find him. My friend’s name is happiness.

I looked inside a school full of children but I did not find my friend, rather I found posters saying 'missing' please help find creativity, imagination and curiosity. The children told me I would find happiness in video games and packaged food but I found violence, distraction and poor quality of health.

I looked inside a college full of youngsters, a promise for a better future but I did not find my missing friend. I found competition, depression and void. The young adults told me I would find happiness in the late-night clubs and Facebook but I found fake faces, double lives, suppressed emotions and broken dreams.

I looked inside an office full of people working so hard but I did not find my missing friend. I found people who have no time, I found people who are tired, stressed and unmotivated. The office people told me to look for happiness in vacation packages and movies in the theatre but I found my friend’s twin called short-lived happiness. He has only gratification and superficial happiness.

The billboard on the road told me I will find happiness in buying new clothes, owning the latest watch or riding the latest bike. When I went and bought those things all I saw was ordinary things giving me momentary pleasure and making me greedy for more stuff.

I looked inside a metro train, and I found people with grim faces using their mobile phones, I looked inside their mobile phone and saw faces with smiles but I still did not find my friend.

I looked inside a cafe and I found people with make up faces, latest fashion but low self esteem. I found people with lots of friends or a beautiful girlfriend / handsome boyfriend but low confidence.

I looked through villages, states and countries for my friend. I found hate and war. I found people dying from lack of water. I found people stripped of their homes because of war over oil. I found animals dying because of lack of habitat. I found plants crying because of heavy pesticides. I found plastic choking the ocean and glaciers melting. I found children working day and night in mines. I found men with very little money struggling to survive. Even mother nature did not know where my friend is.

You see wherever I looked I couldn't find my friend, I am looking for my friend because I am lost too. I hope whenever I find my friend I will find myself too. My name is Peace.

Note : As an author I am not trying to say that happiness and peace doesn't exist or that people are not content with their lives. This is just a way of putting things in different perspective

Learning Driving

I experienced my first car accident. A very minor one with no injuries but it was a very different experience for me. I am not even sure what happened, in the spur of the moment things went wrong and a bike went off balance. The bike suffered a little damage. Definitely I was responsible for the accident, so I stopped and went to apologize. 

I thrown back by the shouting and insulting I started receiving from the biker and bystanders. I was confused because I was apologizing for the accident yet I was being shouted at. On top of it was in a language I couldn't completely understand. I felt scared, angry, confused and overwhelmed. I was told "I will take you to police station, you are lady driver you dont how to drive, who lets you drive on the road". I was so taken back because I was accepting my mistake and repeatably asking now what has to be done. 

Finally the biker agreed to go to the mechanic to get his bike repaired, I felt unfair that I was being completely accused for the accident when it was both parties fault but I was also scared so I just went with the biker and paid for the damages. 

It was a difficult experience for me, I need to work on gaining confidence in myself that I am good driver so that I dont get affected by others opinion.

When I came home, I liked reflecting about the event with my parents and thinking what all I can do next time this occurs. It was an incident to remind me, I am not perfect and I can learn from my mistakes. I am happy that I was able to handle the situation by myself and confidently drive back home.

However I am proud and happy to learn driving. I feel good that I have a skill which helps me be independent. It has been a challenging journey for me to learn driving but has been a very fun experience. 

Gift culture and my experience

Gift culture is a concept that I was introduced through various tools and people. I was left with Awe, to believe that we can look at the world beyond money. People can live with the energy of generousity, love and trust was new for me. Over the years I began experiencing and soon realized that it is not a concept to be understood but to be experienced.

For the benefit of someone who doesn't know what is gift economy or gift culture I will try and explain in my words. To me its about looking at life beyond money, more important than money is the relationship of humans. The earth and its people have enough for our needs and we dont need to live in scarcity, we can live in abundance. In a space where the spirit of trust, generosity and love come rather than selfishness and competition. There are many forms of of practicing gift economy and I am going to share about some that have touched me over the years based on my experience.

Dariya Dil Dukan : Stuff is everywhere, our houses are filled with it but not everything we own we need at all times. Creating spaces for people to give away the things they dont need but can be used by another is what I feel is Dariya dil dukan. Its not about the rich giving to the poor but about sharing among communities.
The shop with the heart as big as the ocean is the literal translation of dariya dil dukan. When I open my heart to giving I have experienced that I receive so much and not always has to be in tangible terms. I have experienced dariya dil dukan go beyond clothes or books, people have offered their homes to come stay, their expertise to learn from and their listening ear. Its really about offering and receiving beyond monetary transaction.
Having hosted many dariya dil dukan myself I am always been left with a so much love. I have been part of spaces where an individual offered a Kindle for anyone to take and also another individual offer a simple small stapler but held with love and care.

Sliding Scale : When I conduct workshops or sessions, I deeply want the workshop to be accessible to all and not let the fees of a workshop come as a barrier of learning. However I also understand that I want to earn some money to get by in this world. Keeping a sliding scale on the fees of a certain service like one example could be Rs.500 to Rs.1500 gives space to the giver to choose yet make sure I am able to cover the bare minimums.

There is also a concept of pay as you wish, where you ask the person to give as they would like. I haven't yet experimented with this concept. There are many other forms of gift economy, some our apart of our traditional Indian system.

Of course gift economy is not perfect and I feel its really about trusting the universe and people. To me its not a system, its about how I want to look at money, trust and life. Its how I understand myself and how I want to take care of my needs and wants.

The latest beautiful experience I went through is when I offered my hosting skills to some people with the intention to learn myself. I was giving without the thought or expectation of getting anything back expect learnings. People were touched by my hosting and work. They offered from their own side, some took me out for a meal, some offered to give me a ride around, some offered a gift and most astonishing for me was to be offered a token of appreciation in form of money.

There are such small moments that fill me with so much love and gratitude. I more and more believe that when I give openly , I am receiving double. I am still discovering my relationship with money and move between scarcity and abundance as my journey progresses. I just have to open my heart to receive love that the universe has to offer.

My trip to Auroville

Flow game :

I got trained as flow game host in 2018 March. There was a sense of inadequacy to host and some blockages to be able to open up and host flow games. I made an impulsive decision to go to Auroville. I was called by the invitation of a fellow host to come co-host at Auroville and that broke the barriers in me.

I co- hosted four flow games. One was a team game. In the process of hosting I was able to appreciate my hosting skills. I really enjoyed hosting flow games at Auroville and it became my central purpose of my time at Auroville.


Auroville :

The first thing that struck me about Auroville was the greenery. It's a beautiful township nestled among so much nature.

I loved the vision of Auroville. I found people very loving and kind. It was so easy to strike conversation with strangers and find new friends. Auroville felt very safe. It was comfortable to ask for lift, it was okay for a  alone women to walk the streets at night, it was safe to leave your cycle or scooter without a lock.
 There is so much space and opportunity. Lots of wonderful experiments, inspiring work and learning opportunities. People are open to people who are curious to learn.
 Of course the place is not Utopia but its a township that very different from anything I have seen and I loved the energy there.

 I visited Sadhana Forest. They are doing some amazing work on reforestation. I went for a tour. I walked out of the tour inspired to look at my food through the lenses of sustainability and look into finding ways to become at least a half vegan if not a complete one.

I visited Solitude farm. They had an interesting Earth festival going on. I learnt lots of recipes of local food and interacted with local food chefs. At the festival I got an natural tiara. I broke my worry of what people would think and went the whole day with my flower crown.

I visited the Mantrimandir. I got to a tour and meditate in the inner chamber. It was a peaceful experience. Got to spend some time with myself. Also through the tour got a better understanding of Auroville.

I ate some good healthy food at Auroville. Yummy food served with love. Best was at the solar kitchen.

Auroville is not perfect but its a town of happiness and meaningfulness.

Note : This blog is purely my personal opinion not a ultimate truth.